Hold the front page! Your Croydon sensation!!!
You wouldn't think there would be much sensation in Croydon Council's municipal magazine, Your Croydon ... but there's a record number of exclamation marks in the October issue of what's self-importantly titled 'Your primary source of community information'. Seventeen, in fact, almost one per page...
Apres the riots, the magazine predictably, launches a 'Love Croydon' campaign. 'We want people to love Croydon!' someone asks ... is this a rhetorical question? Whatever, it's clearly sensational.
My personal favourite exclamation mark is this one - 'Youngsters make clean sweep - with a smile!' Love it!
The riots, looting, violence and arson of August makes an appearance in Your Croydon but curiously, the writing team makes strenuous efforts to avoid using such, presumably inflammatory, terms!
"The incidents of August" is how Council Leader Mike Fisher describes a series of events that saw one person killed, busineses razed to the ground and the town's reputation trashed.
Here are some other Your Croydon euphemisms for 'riot' and 'arson': 'August disturbances', 'the disorder', 'the unrest'. The Mayor, Cllr Graham Bass, prefers simply, 'the events.'
And in a bizarre juxtaposition, a news story that delights in the headline, 'Safe in your area', asks the question, 'Are your savings, home and other property safe from criminals?'. Well, 'the events' tell you that, no ... they're not!
Apres the riots, the magazine predictably, launches a 'Love Croydon' campaign. 'We want people to love Croydon!' someone asks ... is this a rhetorical question? Whatever, it's clearly sensational.
My personal favourite exclamation mark is this one - 'Youngsters make clean sweep - with a smile!' Love it!
The riots, looting, violence and arson of August makes an appearance in Your Croydon but curiously, the writing team makes strenuous efforts to avoid using such, presumably inflammatory, terms!
"The incidents of August" is how Council Leader Mike Fisher describes a series of events that saw one person killed, busineses razed to the ground and the town's reputation trashed.
Here are some other Your Croydon euphemisms for 'riot' and 'arson': 'August disturbances', 'the disorder', 'the unrest'. The Mayor, Cllr Graham Bass, prefers simply, 'the events.'
And in a bizarre juxtaposition, a news story that delights in the headline, 'Safe in your area', asks the question, 'Are your savings, home and other property safe from criminals?'. Well, 'the events' tell you that, no ... they're not!
Editor’s note. When I was at journalism college (yes, hard to believe I know) we were ordered to avoid "screamers, gaspers, or a dog's cocks" – the newspaper terms for exclamation marks – as sensational headlines spoke for themselves. Exclamation marks are designed to show an exclamation (Wow! Boo! Stop!), or show astonishment.
‘The Great Gatsby’ author, F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “Cut out all those exclamation points. An exclamation point is like laughing at your own jokes.” Except, in Your Croydon, there ARE no jokes!
If you don't believe any of the above, you can read it here! Your Croydon
If you don't believe any of the above, you can read it here! Your Croydon
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